Friday, February 5, 2010

No Fats or Fems...shit

There is no phrase that I've ever read that makes me want to pluck my eyes out more in my life than: No Fats or Fems.


There are two types of people in this world: Fat and Non Fat people! The battle between the two are way past the most intense dance off in West Side Story!
I've often overheard, whilst walking down the street or sitting in a synagogue, people discussing important daily facts about the plus size or fat people in their lives.
"Marty, some people say more cushion for the pushin'!" "If there was a plane crash we would have a buffet off of your ass alone, ha!""Tamela, I bet you he floats good!"" I did my taxes on the 25Th of April."( that last statement just goes to prove that sometimes people aren't really listening to the conversation but just always willing to cosign)but I digress.

Everyone loves having a fat best friend, it's comfortable. Think about it, you've always got some body who makes you feel less guilty about eating that pepperoni pizza and that tub of ben and jerry's. I mean what are they gonna say, really? And we too understand our roles in the world. As a a plus size person I understand that I have many functions in relationships. I can serve as a buffer to someone coming out, I can be a date for a wedding, I am inevitably the surprise entertainment at any function (cause we're all funny) and I am always the go to for a great nite out on the town. See getting used to this concept will throw you if you've always been on the outside looking in, like I was before the slip and slide backslash life changing vomit track meet.


Dear gay men, life is not a real porn. Not every gay man is a tool belt wearing, fresh out of the Caribbean, macho acting, barry white voiced, foreign god of ecstasy.I bet half of those men are high pitched lisped challenged booty shorts midriff shirt wearing home decorating gays from Staten Island. They are putting on an act, like most of us do. Why, I will never know. There is nothing wrong with being fem. I know the common statement is if i wanted a woman i would have been with one,well let's be honest gentlemens, w omen won't let you drive down their hershey highway. And in the end, isn't that all that matters?(Get it, that was a joke!) Yet again, I digress. Your sexuality is your own. The most beautiful thing about being a gay man is that you have the choice, without any pretense, to enjoy both sides of the spectrum. You can watch a lacrosse match in stilettos and lipstick and have the time of your life. And no judgements,at least not from me.

We have too much division within our culture. Just because I'm fat doesn't mean that I'm not healthy, it means I may have just inherited whale genes from an obese grandfather and just because I'm a little fem doesn't mean that I'm not enjoying the great things about being purely masculine. Let's open up our minds, like we beg everyone else to do, and start finding the beauty in everybody.

Plussize Twink Out

1 comment:

  1. People need to learn to consider all options presented to digg??