Here's the thing: Bubbleguts are not fun. As a matter of fact, they are rude!
Last night I was on the town, painting it a fierce lavender when I realized I hadn't eaten all day. To conclude my night I stopped by my local chicken shack, at which point I made it my personal goal to snactch up everything greasy and fried, which I did. I may or may not have had two Jamaican beef patties and a Spicy chicken sandwhich and a Mr. Goodbar and a two or three cups of purple soda, in one sitting. Gag, it's okay....I did, afterwords of course! Well this morning when I arose to start my self imposed productive day, I felt a rumble in the tummy and let out the anger of my insides when an instant round two kicked in. Shit i thought. NO literally I thought how much shit is gonna come out of me.
I tried to use all the tricks of the trade: eat some bread, drink some seltzer, pray...nothing worked. Does a rumble in the belly mean that you can't go about your day? As a matter of fact it does not! There I sat positioned at my favorite Starbucks when pot of butt coffee started brewing. With shame and embarassment I entered the resteraunt and began to let go and let God. And now with shame in my heart and the fear of a possible toilet seat induced STD, I write this blog for you. Here is my confession....don't pig out late at night...it's never pretty in the morning!